Less than a relationship, but more than a casual encounter or a sexual call, a situation refers to a romantic relationship that is, and continues to be, indefinite. A situation is that space between a committed relationship and something that is more than a friendship, explains psychotherapist and author Jonathan Alpert. With the continuous introduction of new apps, dating sites and more perspectives on sexuality, comes the introduction of new and indefinable relationships. As if things weren't confusing enough.
When it comes to defining what it means to date but not date someone, it can be difficult to put into words. It's basically a mutual contract for no-strings-attached sex. Unfortunately, most of the time, one party falls in love with the other and the contract is no longer valid. You think of this person as a couple, but to him or her, you're a brother.
The relationship is friendly, of course, but one person wants to take things further. A temporary relationship occurs when you see someone you don't care much for. You've ended a serious relationship but aren't ready to start a new one. While they would like things to be more serious between the two of you, you know deep down that the relationship isn't going anywhere.
You don't want any relationship with this person other than sex. It doesn't matter if they want something else or not, because you're doing it, and all you want is a little sex. You're flirting through text messages and in person, making everyone around you nauseous, but neither of you will pull the trigger and become official. You matched up with this person on Tinder or another dating app.
You chat from time to time through the app's messaging forum, but you have no intention of meeting this person. This person is fun to talk to, but you don't see anything happening in the long term. Consciously or not, we keep these people close to make them feel loved. The stranger in the profile is giving the impression that you are desirable and worth pursuing.
You don't really know this person. They slept together one night and fled early the next morning. But the two of you must have exchanged phone numbers in a conversation you don't remember, because every time this person looks for some action, their phone lights up. It was a mistake, but you're the only one who sees it that way.
You're vulnerable and someone comes in and blows you away, or so you think. As time goes by, you realize that these feelings are superficial and that you have unintentionally deceived this person. You were in a bad situation and foolishly accepted whatever good thing came your way. The difference here with the relationship between apps and couples is that there's a chance you want to meet this person, but you're afraid of looking different in real life (and vice versa).
I'm sure I'm not the only one here who has experienced this type of situation before - so I've defined 11 different types of pre-exclusive relationships to help us understand (and explain) our own hazy situations better: 1) Friends with Benefits: You can call this person to watch TV and hang out, but you both know where the night is headed. 2) Temporary Relationship: A temporary relationship occurs when you see someone you don't care much for. 3) No Strings Attached: You don't want any relationship with this person other than sex. 4) Flirtationship: You're flirting through text messages and in person, making everyone around you nauseous.
5) Tinder Match: You matched up with this person on Tinder or another dating app. 6) Stranger: You don't really know this person. 7) Rebound: You're vulnerable and someone comes in and blows you away. 8) Unintentional Deception: As time goes by, you realize that these feelings are superficial.
9) App Relationship: The difference here with the relationship between apps and couples is that there's a chance you want to meet this person. 10) Non-Monogamous Couples: Some consensual non-monogamous couples may agree that it's OK to sleep with other people but not date other people. 11) Dating: People can choose to date each other consistently and exclusively without having explicitly formalized a long-term commitment. Will these almost but not entirely relationships ever lead to being exclusive? It's hard to tell.
However, one thing remains the same: the only way to label your relationship is to have a conversation. You'll have to be very vulnerable, and this conversation may or may not get you the results you want. Do that or simply set your relationship status official on Facebook and wait for the other person to accept.
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