If you're wondering how many dates you need to go on with someone before you can classify the relationship as official, the answer is not so straightforward. It's not just an arbitrary number, and there are certain signs you should pay attention to that could show that you're ready. To help answer these questions, we turned to Sarah Kahan, a licensed clinical social worker in Brooklyn who helps individuals and couples manage their relationships. The five-date rule is the understanding that if you've had five dates with the person, you should make your relationship official.
Some believe it's an indicator of when you should sleep together for the first time. However, when it comes to making their relationship official, this is something that people do over and over again all too soon. Some will say that the number of dates you go on depends entirely on the person you're going out with and how quickly you fall in love with that person. Although the acceleration could come in the form of engaging dates, few meetings can hardly help someone decide whether or not they have found the “one”.
A dater may feel like they're still struggling to get to know the other person after 12 dates, but then feel a strong connection with another person after just three or four dates. As we mentioned before, in general terms, there is no set number of dates before it is a relationship. There's nothing wrong with a slower relationship, where you stop counting the dates and give the two of you six to eight months for an exclusive relationship to develop slowly and organically over time. Every relationship is different, but if you've been on 3 or 4 dates and you're worried you're not officially engaged, don't be. If you like him or her and you don't want to say yes to a date with someone else, then this is a sign that you like him or her a lot and that things could stand the test of time with that person. Some people consider that having a certain number of dates before making a relationship official is a really useful fee. According to the Time Out survey, the average time it takes for people to get to the sexual part is 3.53 dates; while Groupon respondents reported waiting an average of 8 dates before having sex.
45.2% of those surveyed said they had dated their current partner for less than a month before leaving the market, while 28% of those surveyed said it only took them a month or two. So, if you were to ask me “How many dates before making your relationship official?” I admit that I would be perplexed. To answer how many dates until it is official, I think it's important to note that there is no right answer.